Danielle, 19. I pretend I live in the Bay Area when I don't and I like bell peppers.
It’s so ridiculous the amount of pressure I have put myself under for school. Even in high school, despite the fact I only took like 2 1/2 AP classes and a couple extra curriculars, I prioritized education so high above my own health and my own personal needs. One day I rode my bike to school, got hit by a car and even though the school nurse told me to go home and rest, I refused to leave because I was so afraid of missing my AP class and my extracurriculars. There have been so many nights where I’ve stayed up late doing assignments I haven’t even procrastinated on and not thinking that I deserved sleep because I wasn’t working hard enough. Even the morning after, I’d still be up late that night not taking care of myself, not sleeping, and now I’ve been taking so many classes each semester/intersession trying to power through units and get out of this forsaken wasteland and it’s destroying my mind/mental health and I still keep doing this to myself. I haven’t had a vacation or any real time off probably since high school and it’s hurting. It sucks that I worked so hard in high school to only go to a community college and live with my parents.
Wow school is fun. I get to draw cool shit and watch x files during class.
I wish I didn’t have this need to feel validated all the time by people.I wish I actually had the strength to elaborate.
I wish summer didn’t make me feel so sad.
I’m so tired